NEW LESSON: SUMMER 2007

Learn to stay present. Being in the moment leads to a richer life.

Have you ever found yourself looking forward to an event, only to be distracted by all kinds of thoughts as you go through the motions? You might find yourself thinking about something that happened last week or anticipating what you need to accomplish later in the day. While your thoughts are wandering, you miss out on what is happening in the present. By becoming more mindful of where you place your attention, you will enhance the quality of the experiences that make up your life.

Imagine yourself on vacation. Are you able to take in your new surroundings and enjoy the pleasure of leisure time? Or, are you constantly worried about what is going on at the office. Now imagine yourself at work. Are you able to focus on the project at hand, or are you distracted by thoughts of how you will catch up on your household bills? When you are with your children, do you enjoy the spontaneity of their play? Or, are you consumed with thoughts about... well, something else! You may be so overloaded with tasks to perform and information to process that it can be difficult to really focus on what is immediately before you. Thinking about all of the details in your life may be so automatic that you are unaware as to how you diminish your experience of what is happening in the present.

If the reason for your distractions have more to do with your ambivalence about the situation, then it is important to acknowledge this to yourself. Let's say that you are attending your daughter's high school graduation. As proud as you feel of her, you are overcome with anxiety about sending her off to college. As you watch her get her diploma, your thoughts wander to how lonely you will feel when she leaves home in a few months. Before you know it, the commencement speech is over, and you haven't heard a word. It is good that you have identified your feelings, and you certainly will want to attend to them at a later time. Yet try to gently bring yourself back to the ceremony. After all, your daughter only graduates from high school once in her life. You cannot get these moments back. If you are there in body but not in spirit, you miss out on experiencing the full meaning of these precious hours.

Staying present with yourself means fully experiencing your life. Whether you are taking a walk in your neighborhood, attending a wedding, or on an exotic adventure, make a conscious decision to fully take in the moment. Let the other stuff go. When you do, you will find that that the richness of your experiences increases exponentially. Rather than looking back one day and wondering how time has passed without fully living, you will have collected a myriad of moments and experiences in which you were truly present.

Activity: Just a moment...

One way to practice being in the moment is through a simple meditation. Take five minutes to try this exercise. The five minutes you spend training the mind to stay in the present can help you throughout the day as you practice mindfulness and attend fully to whatever it is you are involved with at that time.

Find a quiet, comfortable space. You may choose to sit on the floor with a cushion or pillow, or you may prefer to sit in a chair. Allow your eyes to close gently, and your body to relax. Notice your breathing, but don't control it. If your breathing is shallow, let it be shallow. If your breathing is heavy, let it be heavy. As your breathing changes, notice it changing. Focus on your inhalation and exhalation. That's all. Just follow your breathing in, and follow your breathing out.

As your mind wanders, which the mind does, gently bring your attention back to your inhalation and then your exhalation. Just notice the breath. That is all. In and out. In and out. Again, when the mind wanders, notice that that is the nature of the mind, and bring your attention back to the breath. You can label where the mind has wandered to, without getting caught in the mind wandering itself. For instance, if your find yourself thinking about what to make for dinner, you can gently notice this, and label that thought "planning" because you were involved in a planning for the future. So give it its name and bring your attention back to the breath. If you find you are thinking about a conversation you had with your friend yesterday, notice it without getting involved in it. Gently name this mind activity as "remembering" because you are remembering a past event, and bring your attention back to the breath. When you hear a dog bark or a car beep its horn, again label this as "dog barking" or "car horn" and go back to following the breath.

Practicing this breathing meditation is a useful way to train the mind to attend to the present. You may want to carve out five minutes a day to practice this breathing meditation. You may choose to sit longer, perhaps fifteen or twenty minutes a day. See what works for you. You may also use this exercise during your daily activities. When you find your mind wandering from the present, label it, and gently bring your attention to what is in front of you now.

As you walk and eat and travel, be where you are. Otherwise you will miss most of your life.

-Buddha